The Full Picture
by HighKingMargo
Summary: The dock scene at the end of 2x06 but Hosie, AKA: Josie and Hope finally get to talk about their feelings.


Deep down, Josie had known something was off. She and Landon could never really work out, not because anyone or anything was standing in their way, but because they weren't quite right together, like two puzzle pieces cut slightly differently. They look like they'd fit, but when you try to match them up, the edges bend and fray as they chafe against one another.

Josie knew she'd been pushing the wrong pieces together, but what was she supposed to do? She didn't see any piece that fit better, and Landon was kind and handsome and reminded her of something she couldn't place. She felt some kind of love for him that she hadn't felt with anybody else.

But now he remembered Hope, and she couldn't imagine him choosing to stay with her. What confused her was that she didn't mind, especially considering how overbearing and possessive she'd been lately. What had possessed her to do that? It all seemed so trivial now that she had her memories back. Now that Hope was back. The last few weeks spent fuming over her, thinking she was some pretty stranger to be jealous of, felt like a fever dream.

She didn't want to look at Landon when he approached her at the dock. She could only hope that however this conversation turned out, they could still be friends.

But it wasn't Landon who sat down next to her. She watched, surprised and somehow relieved, as Hope swung her legs over the dock and twisted her fingers in her lap. She'd expected to feel some kind of bitterness the next time they saw each other, but all she felt was warmth and familiarity.

"I'm sorry you had to find out like this," Hope blurted. "About me and Landon. I mean—I know you already knew, but that was before…" She shook her head. "Anyway, I'm sorry. I really tried not to let you get hurt."

Josie tilted her head. "_You're_ worried about _my_ feelings?"

"You seemed happy."

Even in the darkness Josie could see the pain in Hope's face. Of course this was harder for her; she'd come back to see her boyfriend and all of her friends had moved on, entirely forgotten about her. She'd kept it locked away for weeks. Josie couldn't even imagine the feeling. She looked down and picked at a stray thread on her jeans.

"You should have told us who you were," she said. "You should have—as soon as you got back, you should have told us."

Hope shook her head. "You wouldn't have understood," she said. "It doesn't matter how real it was. You had no idea who I was and I couldn't come crashing into your lives claiming to be someone you knew. I thought it would be better to shoulder it alone."

"Okay," Josie said. "I get that. But then, why did you do it in the first place?" She looked up and met Hope's eyes for the first time, and she felt tears threatening in her own. "What about all of the people here who care about you?"

Hope grimaced, and Josie knew what she wanted to say: how it wouldn't matter who cared about her when they wouldn't remember her anyway. She must have known that reason would mean nothing to her, because she didn't say it.

"I thought I could kill Malivore," she said. "That—keeping you all safe—would have been worth it."

And Josie didn't say what she wanted to say: how it clearly didn't work, how it was a hasty unnecessarily sacrificial decision, and how there had to be another way they could have been looking for together. But it was all said and done now. She tucked her chin into her knees.

"I'm just glad you're back," she murmured. "But…shouldn't you be talking to Landon?"

Hope sighed. "He doesn't want to talk to me yet. I don't blame him." She glanced at Josie. "He's not my boyfriend anymore. I'm surprised he's not talking to you right now."

"He doesn't know where I am. I just figured I'd spend some time alone before dealing with all this."

"Oh." Hope moved to get up. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have bothered you—"

"No, wait." Josie reflexively grabbed Hope's wrist to keep her where she was, then quickly let go. "Can you stay for a little while?"

Hope hesitated, but settled back down when she saw Josie's expression. "Yeah, of course."

"Look," Josie said. She shook her head. "I don't know how to say this. And I'm kind of afraid of admitting it out loud because I don't want anyone to get hurt and I don't want to make anything weird, and—" She sighed. "Landon's amazing. He's a great boyfriend. I know you know that. But when I got my memories of you back…"

Hope frowned. "What?"

"I just don't love him like that," Josie said. "I think…maybe I loved that he reminded me of you somehow? I know that sounds ridiculous. I mean, I shouldn't have had any idea you were gone, and I didn't, really, but I knew something was missing."

"Um." Hope laughed nervously. "I don't really know what you're saying."

"It doesn't matter."

"Yes, it does."

Josie furrowed her brow and studied Hope's face, but she couldn't tell what she saw there. Would it really be so disastrous to say it? She already knew part of the truth.

"Do you remember what I told you last semester after we fought that mummy?"

Hope nodded. "How could I forget?"

Josie shifted and picked harder at the thread on her pants. "I know I kind of implied that was all in the past. And I thought it was, I swear, but all of those memories hit me and I saw you and I realized what I'd been missing, and I just…" She took a deep breath. Nope. She couldn't say it. She couldn't tell Hope she loved her when she'd barely had any time to process it herself.

Hope stared at her for a moment, and then broke into laughter. Her smile was so radiant that Josie almost forgot that laughter was probably a bad response to what she'd been trying to say.

"Sorry," Josie said. "I shouldn't have—"

"No, no, it's not you," Hope said. "I didn't even realize, not until today…"

"Realize what?"

"The croatoan had us cornered before you showed up earlier." Hope pulled her legs onto the dock and crossed them. "We were telling each other secrets to try to keep it away, and I, um…" She paused. "I told Lizzie I used to have a crush on you."

Josie blinked. "What?"

"I know," Hope said. "It's ridiculous. I had a crush on you for a week in ninth grade. Why would I bother keeping that a secret for this long? Why wouldn't I let myself tell you when you told me about yours? It shouldn't have been a big deal."

Josie sat up straighter. This wasn't where she'd expected the conversation to go at all. "But…?"

"But it wasn't just a week." Hope hesitated. "I didn't understand why you were suddenly avoiding me all the time, and I told myself to let it go, but I don't think I really did. I just didn't realize how much I still felt for you until I came back and had to deal with being a stranger to you."

"Okay, now I'm the one who's not really sure what you're trying to say."

"I don't know, either. Everything's been so confusing."

"Hey." Josie reached out to take Hope's hand. Was that inappropriate? She almost let go, but decided not to. "I know I couldn't be there for you before, but I am now."

Hope looked up from Josie's hand to her face, pursed her lips, and nodded. "Thank you," she said.

Josie could tell she was about to tear up and instinctively pulled her into a hug, and she burrowed her face into Josie's chest. She didn't say anything, but Josie could guess how she was feeling. Everyone remembered her now, but she probably still felt alone if even Landon wouldn't talk to her. Why else would she have been wandering alone behind the school?

She suddenly felt fiercely protective of Hope and hugged her tighter until she began to pull away, silently wiping at her eyes.

"Sorry," Hope murmured. "I don't know what came over me."

"It's okay." Josie paused. "You know, the Commonwealth Day celebrations are probably still gonna be going for a few hours. Do you want to go get your mind off everything?"

Hope hummed. "I don't know," she said. "I'm not really in the mood for a lot of fanfare, you know?"

"Yeah, me neither."

"What about a walk?" Hope stood and offered her hand to Josie.

Josie smiled and let Hope help her up. She expected her to let go right away, but Hope only continued to hold her hand as they walked.

So this is what it feels like, she thought as she watched some of Hope's smile return in the moonlight. This is what the right piece feels like, like her frayed edges were soothed and locked comfortably into place with Hope's. She felt some of the heaviness that had been weighing her down lately float away, and she knew that as long as Hope was in the picture here, everything would be all right.


End file.
